


Is There An End Anywhere

by csalt



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Childhood Trauma, Gen, Undertale Spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-15
Updated: 2015-12-14
Packaged: 2018-05-06 20:02:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5428925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/csalt/pseuds/csalt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Our plan had failed, right? So then, why am I here?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Is There An End Anywhere

**Author's Note:**

> I was trying to pin down some thoughts on Chara, so I did some writing to help work some of that out. I thought I'd share it, even though: I haven't done this sort of writing in a while, my perspective on Chara will probably change, and I have no idea how long this will go on for. Any further chapters may not be in sequential order. If I miss any warnings/tags that you think are necessary, don't be afraid to let me know. I'll add more tags as I know what I'll be posting.

It's dark. Heaviness is the first thing they feel. A weight that pulls down on their entire body, discouraging them from rising. Like a heavy wool blanket. But then there's an ache that starts to creep in and suddenly it doesn't feel pleasant anymore. Their limbs move a bit to lessen it, and a soft tickling material brushes against their face. But more aches announce their presence instead so they stop and just rest on the soft and scratchy material for a moment.

Something bright and warm appears, painfully contrasting the pleasant dark that surrounds them. They barely register a familiar smell that makes their mind ache. Then they feel themselves being pushed up by their own limbs again, (still painful, why are they doing this), rising higher still. Dizziness threatens to them  _fall_  back down but there's something supporting them, preventing them from  _falling_  again. They focus on anything but  _that thought_.

_ Yellow. That's the colour. Golden Flowers. And ground, soil. That smell. There's nothing but tall... almost unending... rocky walls around me. Very dark, except for maybe this only light source, from above these flowers.  _

Suddenly they’re moving forward, stumbling. They shake a bit, closing their eyes to stop the world from spinning. Too much, too fast. They want to stop. Go back to being motionless on the ground. A solid thud for each footstep rocks their body, ticking by like long seconds. It shakes them. They curl up, even as they move forward. It feels like minutes before they stop, the pounding still echoing.

"Howdy!"

_ "...is someone there?" _

Their eyes snap open again and light sears back in. They regret it, shutting their eyes again and cover them to stop the burning.

"...you're new to the Underground, aren't 'cha?"

They try again, slower this time. Just a crack. It's still mostly dark, and they're facing another small source of light from above. This time, there's only one yellow flower in the light. It has a face, and it's talking to them. They're sure that this is something new, but somehow, it's not something they're surprised about. The voice from the flower is not the same as the other voice that they heard earlier. They look around the room, but find no one else. Their heart sinks a bit.

"Would you like me to help you?"

Their eyes fall back onto the talking flower, unable to find the owner of the other voice. They stare blankly at the flower, waiting, not really ready to say anything. Suddenly they're thrown up from the ground. They grab themselves, shut their eyes again. Their rise halts. They shudder.

_Gonna fall. Down down down faster sudden force painful everything will hurt but it'll be over again. Finally. Soon, soon, please get this over with, so...so...I'll..._  
  
But nothing happens. Their thoughts repeat over and over whatever the flower's words are. Their mind clears for a moment and they feel their stomach traitorously drop without them.

"...Ready?"

_No._

They feel movement again, slower, and more in control. They open their eyes slowly, expecting more bright light. Well, it was in the form of small, glowing balls, slowly coming towards them. They are also floating towards transfixing glowing balls somehow, yet something itches at the back of their mind, that maybe -

They touch the pellets. They cry out. It first stings like sharp thorns digging into their skin where they touched it, but then it's quickly followed by a barrage of small rounded rocks being thrown against their body.

_ Magic. A monster (of course it's a monster). _

A weird laughter that doesn't sound like any they're heard before hurts their ears. The flower talks, tone darker and twisted from before. They're not really focused on that or the surrounding ring of pellets closing in. They can feel panic rising from up from somewhere but they ignore it, focusing on the stings from the magic dance along their body.

_Why did I even get up? It was nice just not...doing anything._

"...it's kill or be killed...."

A jolt runs through them.

_ " _ _Kill them! KILL them! They'll only kill you if you DON'T DO ANYTHING! Asriel! That's how it is! It's...!"_

_But there's someone warm holding them, saying non-nonsensical words, ("It's okay, we shouldn't", but it won't ever be_ _okay,) even as they feel pain, sharp pain, and he cries out-_

Eyes begin to sting, hands pulling painfully at their hair.

_ “No, no no run just run just make it back...!” _

Warm energy enveloping them rips their thoughts away. They recognize the sudden surge of energy in their body as healing magic. Their heart leaps as white and purple steps into the ring of light.

"...What a terrible creature."

_ " _ _Terrible, troublesome child. Don't you know what torment you bring…?”_

Their chest twists and pains sharply. They tense, the burning in their eyes increasing as they try to swallow fear. They listen desperately through the pounding beats in the head to the sound of that voice but with those words.

_ It's...not her. It's not...it's not... _

Their blurring vision is met with two eyes looking only at them. Her eyes show that familiar care and kindness. Her smile warm and sweet as her voice and fur.

_ It's...Mom. _

But her eyes don't show recognition.

_ It's me. _

As their body somehow follows Mom, they watch her smile grow even larger as if it hadn't known how to truly smile in such a long time. A mixture of uncertainty and happiness rises further when her large, warm, soft paw engulfs their own hand. Her face displays only the most extreme kindness that one could show a lost, strange child. The disconnect makes them not pay attention to where they're going. They're not even really listening to what Mom says, just quietly soaking in her words and presence. Enjoying the familiarity and the strange feeling of being with her, but being ignored.

Then there's a spike in heartrate and they pull themselves from their thoughts just as Mom suddenly runs off. Her apologies are lost to the shock and previous inattentiveness.

_ Why, why is Mom doing this...? No, not again... _

They're walking quickly down the hallway and somehow their own panic doesn't swallow their own, but some kind of hope pushes them forward. They hang onto that irrational positive feeling, wherever it came from. But when the end of the large hallway comes into sight the hope quickly vanishes from their desperate grasp and they begin to feel something other than their own panic bubble up. It bubbles under their skin and through ready to burst from their chest. It's more uncontrolled than anything they've felt before. That scares them even more than having this happen again.

They pass the white pillar at the end of the room, ready to drop to the ground from the drain of whatever the heck was happening to their mind and body. Sudden movement of white separating from the pillar catches their eyes as Mom reappears again. They're startled at her sudden reappearance as their heart pounds even harder in their ears. Relief and uncertainty mix unhealthily together, making themselves tenser than they feel they should be. They wish they could step away from her when she approaches them, but their body doesn't listen. They let her kneel down in front of them, wiping away the tears they didn't know they head on their face, paws gently brushing their hair, finally handing them a "phone". They hardly listen, feeling their head nod, trying hard not to shake.

They're tired. They wished they would just walk away already. Or Mom would just leave them alone. And when she tells them to wait and that she'll be back soon, the sudden alone time they were wishing for feels unwanted. There's confusion that rises, but it's not their own, they don't think. Which just adds to the confusion.

They don't want to move forward, but their body moves onto the next room anyways.


End file.
